Ways in which revision ruins your life:
- Becoming fat. I even have fat feet as I discovered today.
- Diagnosing randomers in the street with conditions that I’ve been revising about recently (and then becoming really concerned for them in case they do actually have (highly unlikely) whatever it is you think they do, but they don’t know about it and then they might become really ill).
- Not caring about my physical appearance and living in the same tracksuit bottoms/PJs for a month.
- Taking half an hour out of revision time to help do the washing up seems like the most unreasonable thing ever and will the sole cause of me failing my exams, but watching an hour of Grand Designs during my “revision break” is fine.
- Spurting out medical information whenever my boyfriend/the tv/bus adverts/pretty much any outside stimulus mentions anything vaguely medically related and then getting really cross when I can’t remember a key bit of information (eg. specific blood test) about whatever it is I’m shouting about. This then equals a cross boyfriend because trying to remember medicine means that I’m not paying attention to what he’s saying or else I’m talking over the tv programme we’re watching.
- Becoming unreasonably aggravated and obsessive over the slightest noises disturbing your revision – how dare your neighbour do their washing at 11am on a weekday! How can they not prioritise your learning time over everything else?
- Developing bi-polar disorder - complete and utter stress one moment about not knowing anything at all and despair at never being able to learn even a third of the never ending pile of revision notes to a lackadaisical attitude towards the whole thing, believing that I’ll be fine, I’ve done lots of revision and I’m sure I’ll have that amazing revision day tomorrow where I’ll manage to revise half of the material for the exam and all of the knowledge will magically fall into my brain…